Thoroughly Milly

I'm shy, chubby, and emotional. I love cooking, doing new things, and I rarely follow through any of my goals. This is my journey to love myself, just as I am.
~ Monday, January 16 ~
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Funny Thing, This New Weight Watchers or Watch Me Attempt to Psychoanalyze Myself

Today, I did weight watchers for real.

Let me explain what I mean.  All those times I said I was going to “do weight watchers,” “plug in everything I eat,” “blah blah,” “I’m totally doing it this time,” etc, I would be awesome until I got out of bed and skipped breakfast.  Sleep is more important, you know this.

Other times, I’d do well until I got home and became a vacuum for some reason (I really have no idea why I do this).  I’d shy away from tracking my intake because I was ashamed and didn’t want to see that negative, red number yelling at me.

“I’ll just start over tomorrow.”  This meant “Eat everything!”

The next day, I’d do the same thing.

When I’m doing this for real, I mean I face it and track every single thing like I’m supposed to do (who knew?!).

I haven’t done weight watchers, really, since I was in college.  It has changed since 2006.  I thought I did badly today and I felt that usual guilt feeling.  I tracked my points anyway and I have 1 whole point to spare.

How?  What’s going on?

I have some theories:

  1. I left something off (I didn’t)
  2. Weight watchers has given me way too many points
  3. I didn’t do as bad as I thought
  4. The act of eating makes me feel guilty

The act of eating makes me feel guilty…  That shit needs to stop right now. 

I think, if I hadn’t tracked my points today, I would have felt that guilt again.  And what would I do if I felt guilty?  I would eat some more. 

Where is this going?  I have no idea. 

Moral of the story?  Suck it up, track your points, and stop being a baby.

Now I’m going to go eat or drink the crap out of my last point.

Tags: weight watchers Call me Freud
14 notes
  1. sayhellotocindy said: Great title to the post and OH YEAH, I know EXACTLY what you are talking about!!!!
  2. lizison said: I love this. I can relate. For reals.
  3. twentyonetolife said: I just joined WW!
  4. regainingmymoxy said: It will make you own up to your decisions. Do it. Even on bad days. You can get this Milly.
  5. lostweightgainedlove said: God created bananas so I could sleep in. you can do it milly
  6. lindsaydoeslife said: i hear you on the whole “feeling guilty” thing. i notice it happens to me when i eat out of some emotion or “just ‘cause it tastes” good. it helps me to think of food as fuel for my body and really think about what i’m putting in my body :)
  7. thoroughlymilly posted this